Walking to Love
by RadcliffeRox24
Summary: R for some language, etc. Harry is nineteen and living with Lupin. He hasn't talked to his best friends for a long time. Poeple he thought were distant slowly connect him...
1. Prologue

Author's notes: JK Rowling owns it all, not me (boo hoo)

ok if any of you have read my bio page then you know that this is the story that's about lupin and harry. ok that sounds weird, let's get one thing straight: this is NOT slash!!! but the main characters are harry and lupin, so....yeah. anyway, this is just the prologue, and its really dumb. but the plot will pick up very soon afterwards. VERY soon afterwards. oh and by the way, this will be a pretty short fanfic. i doubt it will exceed fifteen chapters or so. and be patient with me, because this is my first fanfic (although i plan to write lots more) and i don't have a beta yet. sorry! anyway, the prologue is kind of dumb but bear with me! it will get lots beter! ok now on with the story...

Prologue

Harry lay on Lupin's hammock, a butterbeer on the wicker table next to him. After all the years, he still loved the stuff.

"Remus..." he began. Remus Lupin was sitting lazily in a rocking chair. It was around 5:00, and Lupin and Harry had just come home from work, with Harry. The two of them had kicked off their brown Oxfords and peeled off their black socks. Finally, they dumped their jackets and white dress shirts on the back of the couch and raced outside. It was a beautiful summer afternoon. Harry, laughing, had claimed the hammock and flopped down before Lupin was able to say anything. Now they were enjoying their cool drinks and the comfortable silence. But something had been eating away at Harry since being out of Hogwarts, and that was: why didn't Lupin have a girl? Or did he? Such a women-pleaser ought to...

"Who do you love?" It sounded childish, and he knew it. But it was a serious question. Plus, Harry knew Lupin would be honest with him. So many days of being a prankster had taught him the virtue of being honest. Lupin sighed. Harry had asked him before, and he never had really wanted to answer. But at those times, Harry had taken back the question, thinking it was inappropriate. Remus could see it wasn't going to happen this time. Harry waited.

"I... um..." he was going to have to avoid the question, lie to Harry, or tell the truth. The truth, which he hadn't ever told Peter. The truth, which was concealed from Sirius until a year after they were reunited. The truth, which he had almost never, ever, told James. Harry waited. The answer, he thought, may not come. The answer may be painful. But he was willing.

"I... er..." He was clearly hoping Harry would take back the question, as he had done countless times before. But not this time. Harry was persistent. If he was a girl, he would like Lupin a lot, he thought. Him being a werewolf would not hold him back. Remus was funny, caring, romantic, daring... all that a girl would want. All that a homosexual would want. But Remus just wasn't. That was all there was to it. He tried again.

"I... loved..."Oh no. Harry was now sure it would be painful. Lupin's face seemed contorted with pangs of... was it hurt? Sadness? Harry felt terrible for asking, but he wanted to know. Lupin spoke very quietly.

"_Lily_"

"Shit." Harry's mind had wandered through all the women he knew, his mind even crossing McGonagal, Hermione, and Molly Weasley. Hell, he had even entertained the idea that Lupin actually _was_ gay and currently infatuated with Harry himself. That, at least, would explain him being so reluctant to answer the question. But his mother? Lily Evans? He felt terrible. " I'm sorry," he said quietly. Lupin was silent. Then he said brightly, "But I got over her after 5th year." Harry looked at Lupin. His eyes were dancing. "You fucker!" Harry shouted playfully. "You led me on! Bastard!" he said, laughing. He jumped off the hammock, pulled Lupin out of his chair, and pinned him to the ground. Lupin nearly had tears in his eyes from laughter. Harry was over him, pinning him to the ground. A neighbour would have thought it looked odd or un-customary, but Harry and Lupin did this all the time. Harry was able to brace himself for what was coming. Lupin kneed him from behind so that Harry went toppling over Remus. They lay in the grass, laughing. _(A/N: this may sound weird, but the way i think of it, it's just like some people play around with their uncles (or dogs!) sometimes. It is NOT supposed to sound wrong!)_

They were relaxed roommates together, but outside there was tension. Everyone knew of _his_ presence. Everyone knew what _he_ could do to people's happiness. And it made their lives disintegrate. They did not want to live with fear. No one wanted rivalries. The Malfoys might have been ruthless people who acquired enemies everywhere and seemed to enjoy it, but it was simple. Everyone wanted to be united. There shouldn't have been separation. It should be easier.

But it wasn't.

* * *

Harry rarely thought about the past. He would occasionally wonder what certain people were doing every once in a while, but mostly he thought of himself, Lupin, the numerous people he had to destroy, and the countless people he had to save.

Lupin thought about the past very often. He loved reminiscing, however painful it might be, because he marveled over change. It was unfathomable, really, how many people could be doing such different things over the years. It kept him awake at night. He thought about why things happened and why others never did get done. Lily probably loved him at one point, but he never asked her to any balls, or dances, or Hogsmeade visits. He barely talked to her. But he didn't harass her like James. He should have stopped while he was ahead. Remus knew for a fact that in second year, Lily had been infatuated with Sirius for half the time, then moved on to the funny, charming, James Potter. He, at that time, had liked a Ravenclaw, who had mysteriously been seen holding Severus Snape's hand in the corridors. It was part of what had started the enmity between James and Severus, Lupin recalled. James should have given up on Kitty, the Ravenclaw, at that time and knew about Lily. But it was no use. They had gotten together in the end, and Remus was predictably left matchless. But there was always Sirius. Peter was a rat (quite literally– what a coincidence, thought Remus), but Sirius was always there. He had never loved Lily, But he had been through rejection. And he was there to talk to Lupin. Always, even if he was...

Lupin took out the very small silver box, opened it, and said, "I solemnly swear I will talk to a Marauder." There was a tinkle of friendly music, almost like one hears in a shop door on a quiet day near Christmastime in the winter. Then the box said, in a sexy female voice, "The Messengers Moony, Wings, Padfoot, and Prongs bring themselves to life for you."

"Sirius," Lupin said. "Sorry it's been a long time, how are you?"

* * *

More author's notes: _Wings_ will be explained in the next chapter, i promise. oh, and i'm sorry if the prologue seemed really short i will try to make the chapters longer. The whole deal about harry asking remus who he loves was kind of irrelevant, but the whole thing will be resolved later. I promise! Oh, and i know long paragraphs get boring, but they're IMPORTANT. so don't neglect them. I like reading and writing dialogue a lot better, but there are some things the author has to explain, not the characters.

Also, this will probably be cleared up later in the story, but this story is set after Hogwarts. Harry is nineteen and working as a part-time Auror at the ministry.

well, please read and review and enjoy the story! I will be updating at least every weekend, hopefully more often that that!

once again, PLEASE REVIEW!!

--RadcliffeRox24


	2. The Box and Tonks

Chapter Two: The Box and Tonks

Harry had been more than a little annoyed with Lupin's answer. He was so sure he'd get an answer, but he had been disappointed. He hoped that Lupin would tell Harry that he fancied his secretary, who'd had a crush on Lupin for quite some time now. If that was the case, the story would have a happy ending. But Remus had as good as avoided the question, which made Harry wonder if Remus distrusted him.

Harry didn't know the box existed. Remus, Sirius, James, and Lily had all decided that it would be dangerous for Harry, almost like the Mirror of Erised. It would become a sort of addiction for Harry. Or, there was the possibility that he would doubt the device and distrust Lupin. Harry might think he was being teased, but he could really never see or talk to his parents and godfather.

The box was a device that the Marauders had come up with after Hogwarts, excluding Peter, of course, and adding Lily. She became an unauthorized animagus-- an eagle. Her name was _Wings_.

When they were in the first Order and realized how many deaths there would be, they decided to create a device that would enable then to talk to the dead. But people reluctant. Justifiably, they said it just didn't seem right– to disturb their "slumber."

James, Remus, Sirius, and Lily didn't agree. They knew the dead had important secrets and stories to tell. Since they knew that they themselves may soon be dead, they created the device just for themselves. And they made sure to carry the silver box with them everywhere, at all times.

It was all Lupin could do to keep quiet about it. He so dearly wanted to discuss his chats with Harry.

One Sunday, Remus and Harry were enjoying a nice breeze when Nymphadora Tonks dropped in. She apologize profusely for disturbing their day, but they assured her that it was no trouble at all.

"We were just going to have some tarts ourselves, but now we can share," said Lupin enthusiastically. Harry rolled his eyes. Tonks was obliged to join them for tea and apple tarts (A/N: doesn't that sound yummy?!), and they shared some friendly talk and laughter, Remus participating heartily. Harry could see it in his face the whole time: _He's hiding something, _Harry thought. Just then, Tonks turned to him.

"And now for why I came to bother you on a Sunday. Harry..." Harry sighed inwardly. He hoped this would not be a Molly Weasley-ish talk. He didn't want a touchy-feely woman prying into his life right now.

"Oliver Wood is having... problems with the team he's on now," she said. Tonks worked in the department of wizard sports at the ministry. She knew all about all the stars. "He got himself into a spot of trouble at the last celebration party, and he doesn't think he can make it for much longer. So he's resigning."

"Oliver Wood?"

"Yes. He already knows who he wants to take his place."

"Who?"

"He's kept it very quiet. Not many people know. But it will be out soon enough."

"But isn't it the team manager's job to appoint new team members?"

"Not in this case. He told them he wanted to do them a favour, and he know just who would be up to the standards of being on the team."

"But... Not many people can be as good as him."

"Yes, there are a few. He's chosen wisely." She stood up, smiling at him, and then said, "Remus? May I talk to you?"

"Of course," answered Remus. The two went inside, leaving Harry alone on his hammock. Inside, Tonks turned to Remus.

"So... tell me. Are you still in contact with James and Sirius?"

"Yes, I talked to him last night." Tonks was one of the few people who could be trusted enough to know about the silver boxes.

"What about James? What happens when you talk to them? What do they say?"

"They all want to talk to Harry. Desperately," he added for effect.

"Aren't you ever going to tell Harry about these things? If you want too long, he's going to think you've been secretive or disloyal."

"I know. But it would be painful for him... Imagine never hearing a father's voice... amazing. Well, he's heard it, just not enough." Lupin was lost in thought. He wanted to be a father so badly. He had never had a father, because he banished Lupin after the bite, saying it was a disgrace to have a werewolf in the family. Amazingly, at that time, Sirius had run away from _his_ house, so they rented an apartment together. The story seemed a bit like a fairy tale every time it was told, and indeed those years were the happiest of his life. He never, ever had missed his father after he left home. But he felt like he had to repay society for never loving his father. He wanted to have a child who would always love him. He wanted to always love a child.

When Harry got inside, Tonks had left, and he set to milling around in his head the possibilities for Seeker on Wood's former team. He would be jealous of whoever it was, he was sure.

Lupin was making dinner when Harry got inside. They took turns cooking and tonight was spaghetti with hamburger. It smelled so good!

"Hello, Harry!" Remus said cheerfully. _Oh no_, thought Harry, _he's in one of those enthused moods. Groan._

"Hi. Dinner smells good," said Harry as he walked to the refrigerator. Just then, the phone rang. Most wizards who lived in London lived in a Muggle fashion, because occasionally there would be house searches, and they didn't want to be identified as people who were out of the ordinary. Harry went to get the phone.

"Hello?"

"Mr. Potter?"

"Yes, this is Harry." He didn't like being called "Potter." Names can be fickle friends.

"This is Oliver. Wood," he added. Harry's breath caught in his chest.

"Mr. Wood?" _I'm such a hypocrite_, thought Harry. Lupin looked up from his pan of burger to look over at Harry. He had heard the last name.

"Yes, Harry, how are you?"

"Just great, Oliver."

"I wanted to talk with you about something... a bit... personal."

"Of course. I'd be more than willing to listen." He shot an apologetic look at Lupin, because he knew dinner would be ready soon.

"Are you sure you have the time?"

"Definitely."

"OK, where to begin," he laughed. "I just... I recognize that you have come a long way in Quidditch. You are very good."

"Thanks, Oliver."

"I wanted to give you a chance to shine. I want you to play in my place for the next year."

"But aren't you a Keeper?"

"No. I changed to Seeker because I became better at that as time went on."

"So you want me to play on your team in your place, for a whole year?!"

"Yes. Will you?"

"Can I talk it over with you a bit more, later?"

"I'd love to do that."

"Erm... Tuesday?" He looked at Remus, who nodded vigorously. Harry's brow furrowed, but he returned to his conversation with Wood. "Is Tuesday OK?"

"Great. Six at Jennie's?" Jennie's was the most popular wizarding pub in London.

"Sounds great. See you then." They said good-bye and Harry walked over to the table, where Remus had already set up dinner. Remus looked up from where he was sitting patiently and smiled. Harry smiled back.

"Chance of a lifetime, Harry. Will you take the offer?"

"How'd you know?"

"Tonks knew. She told me, but she knew Wood would call you and tell you about it himself, so she left you guessing."

"Well, I think I'll take it anyway. Blasted Tonks," he said, but smiled.


	3. Jennie's Bar and Grille

author's notes: I don't own JK Rowlings work, blah blah, you know it all. yay new chappie! so as I promised, _Wings_ is explained in this chapter and lots else. so read and enjoy, and please click the little button that says "submit review" at the bottom! i think this chappie is a bit longer but I'm not sure. I am REALLY trying to elongate the chapters and add more dialogue so you don't have to sit throught a lot of boring paragraphs without people talking!!! anyway, the plot really starts to develop in this chapter, and is continued more than ever in the third chapter!! which i plan to have up very very soon! yay! and no, morough, wings does not mean mccartney (although it is a nice allusion, isn't it?!). (inside joke kinda, read my bio!)

Chapter Two: The Box and Tonks

Harry had been more than a little annoyed with Lupin's answer. He was so sure he'd get an answer, but he had been disappointed. He hoped that Lupin would tell Harry that he fancied his secretary, who'd had a crush on Lupin for quite some time now. If that was the case, the story would have a happy ending. But Remus had as good as avoided the question, which made Harry wonder if Remus distrusted him.

Harry didn't know the box existed. Remus, Sirius, James, and Lily had all decided that it would be dangerous for Harry, almost like the Mirror of Erised. It would become a sort of addiction for Harry. Or, there was the possibility that he would doubt the device and distrust Lupin. Harry might think he was being teased, but he could really never see or talk to his parents and godfather.

The box was a device that the Marauders had come up with after Hogwarts, excluding Peter, of course, and adding Lily. She became an unregistered animagus as an eagle under the faux-name _Wings._When they were in the first Order and realized how many deaths there would be, they decided to create a device that would enable then to talk to the dead. But people reluctant. Justifiably, they said it just didn't seem right– to disturb their "slumber."

James, Remus, Sirius, and Lily didn't agree. They knew the dead had important secrets and stories to tell. Since they knew that they themselves may soon be dead, they created the device just for themselves. And they made sure to carry the silver box with them everywhere, at all times.

It was all Lupin could do to keep quiet about it. He so dearly wanted to discuss his chats with Harry.

One Sunday, Remus and Harry were enjoying a nice breeze when Nymphadora Tonks dropped in. She apologize profusely for disturbing their day, but they assured her that it was no trouble at all.

"We were just going to have some tarts ourselves, but now we can share," said Lupin enthusiastically. Harry rolled his eyes. Tonks was obliged to join them for tea and apple tarts (A/N: doesn't that sound yummy?!), and they shared some friendly talk and laughter, Remus participating heartily. Harry could see it in his face the whole time: _He's hiding something, _Harry thought. Just then, Tonks turned to him.

"And now for why I came to bother you on a Sunday. Harry..." Harry sighed inwardly. He hoped this would not be a Molly Weasley-ish talk. He didn't want a touchy-feely woman prying into his life right now.

"Oliver Wood is having... problems with the team he's on now," she said. Tonks worked in the department of wizard sports at the ministry. She knew all about all the stars. "He got himself into a spot of trouble at the last celebration party, and he doesn't think he can make it for much longer. So he's resigning."

"Oliver Wood?"

"Yes. He already knows who he wants to take his place."

"Who?"

"He's kept it very quiet. Not many people know. But it will be out soon enough."

"But isn't it the team manager's job to appoint new team members?"

"Not in this case. He told them he wanted to do them a favour, and he know just who would be up to the standards of being on the team."

"But... Not many people can be as good as him."

"Yes, there are a few. He's chosen wisely." She stood up, smiling at him, and then said, "Remus? May I talk to you?"

"Of course," answered Remus. The two went inside, leaving Harry alone on his hammock. Inside, Tonks turned to Remus.

"So... tell me. Are you still in contact with James and Sirius?"

"Yes, I talked to him last night." Tonks was one of the few people who could be trusted enough to know about the silver boxes.

"What about James? What happens when you talk to them? What do they say?"

"They all want to talk to Harry. Desperately," he added for effect.

"Aren't you ever going to tell Harry about these things? If you want too long, he's going to think you've been secretive or disloyal."

"I know. But it would be painful for him... Imagine never hearing a father's voice... amazing. Well, he's heard it, just not enough." Lupin was lost in thought. He wanted to be a father so badly. He had never had a father, because he banished Lupin after the bite, saying it was a disgrace to have a werewolf in the family. Amazingly, at that time, Sirius had run away from _his_ house, so they rented an apartment together. The story seemed a bit like a fairy tale every time it was told, and indeed those years were the happiest of his life. He never, ever had missed his father after he left home. But he felt like he had to repay society for never loving his father. He wanted to have a child who would always love him. He wanted to always love a child.

When Harry got inside, Tonks had left, and he set to milling around in his head the possibilities for Seeker on Wood's former team. He would be jealous of whoever it was, he was sure.

Lupin was making dinner when Harry got inside. They took turns cooking and tonight was spaghetti with hamburger. It smelled so good!

"Hello, Harry!" Remus said cheerfully. _Oh no_, thought Harry, _he's in one of those enthused moods. Groan._

"Hi. Dinner smells good," said Harry as he walked to the refrigerator. Just then, the phone rang. Most wizards who lived in London lived in a Muggle fashion, because occasionally there would be house searches, and they didn't want to be identified as people who were out of the ordinary. Harry went to get the phone.

"Hello?"

"Mr. Potter?"

"Yes, this is Harry." He didn't like being called "Potter." Names can be fickle friends.

"This is Oliver. Wood," he added. Harry's breath caught in his chest.

"Mr. Wood?" _I'm such a hypocrite_, thought Harry. Lupin looked up from his pan of burger to look over at Harry. He had heard the last name.

"Yes, Harry, how are you?"

"Just great, Oliver."

"I wanted to talk with you about something... a bit... personal."

"Of course. I'd be more than willing to listen." He shot an apologetic look at Lupin, because he knew dinner would be ready soon.

"Are you sure you have the time?"

"Definitely."

"OK, where to begin," he laughed. "I just... I recognize that you have come a long way in Quidditch. You are very good."

"Thanks, Oliver."

"I wanted to give you a chance to shine. I want you to play in my place for the next year."

"But aren't you a Keeper?"

"No. I changed to Seeker because I became better at that as time went on."

"So you want me to play on your team in your place, for a whole year?!"

"Yes. Will you?"

"Can I talk it over with you a bit more, later?"

"I'd love to do that."

"Erm... Tuesday?" He looked at Remus, who nodded vigorously. Harry's brow furrowed, but he returned to his conversation with Wood. "Is Tuesday OK?"

"Great. Six at Jennie's?" Jennie's was the most popular wizarding pub in London.

"Sounds great. See you then." They said good-bye and Harry walked over to the table, where Remus had already set up dinner. Remus looked up from where he was sitting patiently and smiled. Harry smiled back.

"Chance of a lifetime, Harry. Will you take the offer?"

"How'd you know?"

"Tonks knew. She told me, but she knew Wood would call you and tell you about it himself, so she left you guessing."

"Well, I think I'll take it anyway. Blasted Tonks," he said, but smiled.

* * *

A/N: if you have any questions about the story i'd be happy to answer them :-) because i know how frustrating it is when the author assumes you know something you don't and stuff like that, or if the story's just plain confusing. so please ask questions! tell me i'm horrible! whatever! just review please and i will LOVE you!!! Reviews from last time i mostly answered in this chapter, but I'll acknowledge them anyway:

HoshiHikari: yes, wormtail is excluded, the brat. my view of the whole "marauders" thing is that remus, sirius, and james never really liked wormtail, and he just tagged along with them and waskind of a quiet little jerk in the corner.and he turned out to be on the "bad" side anyway! so i really hate wormtail, and that's why he was excluded.

morough: patience is a virtue, oh dear one...

angryattheworld: glad you liked it! i'm writing as fast as i possibly can... :-)

* * *


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